Thursday, November 28, 2019

Mckfoul and the Huntsman


Far away from human power
Striding hard in rainy showers
The huntsman paused to smell his prey
A pungent odor vent of decay
Unsheathing thus his might sword
Wrapped most well in cotton cord
Dashed off was he to where he may
A stronghold place that none would say
He caught the scent and there he goes
A thoroughbred stallion on his toes
Of danger and peril he cared not
But simply that he earn his lot
To live and work and breath and eat
The huntsman moved quick on his feet
From Ravagaz to Ovonkon
And Xarwaxim and Kubinekong
From Morphanx mines and sewers gritty
To Kobal mountain and stone city
To hunt elk and deer and Buffalo
And monsters crude like none before
At last, he came to Asantron
Deserted castle of Kings long gone
Foul thoughts were in the air
But it would not shake the huntsman’s stare
Of river, hill, and tree and flower
This was the time and this the hour
To slay the hungry beast Mckfoul
To rid the night of its cruel howl
Mckfoul was strong with might a plenty
Nine-teen claws or maybe twenty
A long thick neck like a mighty oak
A strong wide mouth to swallow folk
Its fur was green mud-slick and filthy
He won’t survive this peril will he?
With lightning speed and sudden reflex
The huntsman fired on its anal cortex
The arrow did little Mckfoul aroused
He craned his neck with screeching howls
And while the huntsman stunned stood reeling
Mckfoul plunged him into the ceiling
But stones could never break his soul
The huntsman delivered his thoughts in full
You’re no monster you rubber mechanic
You’re an undersized lobster or a gofer titanic
You can’t compute a phrase of eloquence
Like “pass the tea” or “mind my elephants!”
Pass the tea repeated Mckfoul
I don’t need such language he said with a scowl
I eat people for fun I do it with glee
I don’t have to bother with Elephants and tea
Is that so replied the huntsman
Recovering now the celling blow bloodstained
“Would Sir Jac Mckfoul please pass me the juicer
And while Mckfoul stood all confused there
The huntsman plunged his sword into foul’s heart
I’ve learned your ways too he said with a start
You value surprise in every battle
I’ve just beat you to it with one foot in the saddle
You beat me I’ve lost growled the old weary villain
I’m sorry for all of my gruesomely kill’n
I hope you’ll respect me for our unsportly duel
And tell kids the tale of old great Mckfoul encounter

1 comment:

  1. It reads like an epic. Classic and old, but with a little whimsical humor too. Good writing.

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